Santosh had had enough. That dingy room in Mukherjee Nagar was stifling his very existence, stultifying his will to live. 5 attempts in 5 years, and nothing to show for it. He hadn’t even come close to clearing the preliminary exam, let alone the mains and then the interview, it all seemed illusory. All he had were the dreams in his head, put in there by his parents, teachers, and friends. At 26, he saw his friends doing great things, one of his dearest friends had become a stand-up comic, another one became an author, touring the world promoting his book. Whereas Santosh was spending his days in a 12 by 8 room vying for that swiveling chair with a white towel hanging lavishly on its back.
He had a bachelor’s degree in English Literature from a very revered institution, and could have gone on to do great things in life, but didn’t. The allure of a safe and secure government job made everything else seem unworthy. I mean sure, he could work at a private company, but where is the prestige in that? “A car without a blue siren on its roof, huh, disgusting”, he thought when he had just started preparing for UPSC. “A huge bungalow, a lavish office, people who worship you, a hefty rate in the marriage market, all the luxuries in life.” Said the receptionist at Bright Minds Coaching Center, whilst hideously sliding the fee structure brochure towards Santosh.
‘1 lakh 50 thousand per year’. It wasn’t much after all, one could easily fetch dowry of a Crore and above if and when one becomes an IAS officer. Santosh was convinced, he was not born to do mundane things in life, he was here to be an officer. All his teachers told him that, year after year, after each failed attempt. “You are bright, you will eventually crack it, just make sure to pay the fees on time”. Santosh kept burning the midnight oil, and kept being snubbed each year.
After his 3rd failed attempt, he was ready to try for a job in the private sector and finally abandon his rundown apartment in Mukherjee Nagar. That is when his favourite teacher at Bright Minds got to know of this, Dr. Prakash Pandey, who got a hold of him one day and said to him “You have it in you Santosh, don’t leave so early, you are very young, give it 2 more years at the very least, you have that spark in your eyes, it’s like you were born to be a DM”. Santosh was elated, in his 3 years at Bright Minds, no one had praised him like this. “Thanks Prakash Sir, I will give it 2 more years if you say so”. “Of course you will, I know you never ignore my advice, just keep paying the fees on time, everything else will fall in place automatically”. Years later Santosh found out that Dr. Prakash said this to every person who was trying to leave the institution.
Santosh sat on his bed, ruminating upon all of this, contemplating what life could have been if he had left after his 3rd failed attempt. Now he has lost all hope. His friends were touring the world, writing books, going to concerts, enjoying, and here he was in Mukherjee Nagar, with 5 years of absolute nothingness reverberating continuously in his mind. “I should end it all, I am 26, and I can’t possibly redeem myself at this stage anyway”.
Santosh set out for the Yamuna River, jumping from a building was impractical, since all the buildings in Mukherjee Nagar were barely 3 stories high, and that can only reduce your bank balance at most, not your lifespan. Slitting his wrist seemed a bit too gross for his taste, plus he used to pass out at the mere sight of blood, imagine it gushing out all at once, ugh! So the Yamuna River it was.
He reached a ledge on the banks of Yamuna, confident that this would lead to his demise, since he did not know how to swim. He stood there for a couple of minutes, with his eyes closed, praying to God. “Please fulfill this wish at the very least, since you have rejected all the others”. He jumped, with his eyes closed, without even looking down.
It took half a second for his feet to touch the water, by the next second he knew something was terribly wrong, the water felt weird on his skin. Water is supposed to feel wet, but this felt funny. So he opened his eyes, only to find himself floating with miles of foam all around him. He was shocked at first, but then laughed his heart out. He laughed so loud that the people walking near the banks looked at him with great amusement. He had read about this for the Current Awareness section of his examination, but could not anticipate this. He laughed and laughed and laughed, and there was a touch of truth and innocence in his laughter, unadulterated by the corruption of the world. “What a foamy situation”, he said out loud, and laughed even harder, a laugh that resembled Ravana’s.
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